180 Holiday Blues: Blue Can Be Beautiful Azure, Cobalt, Aquamarine
The main topic for this episode starts at about 20 min. in.
But it starts after recounting – in great detail – a recent social media post by former “Housewife” (of New York City) Bethany Frankel, all about going holiday shopping at The Dollar Tree.
And now, a disclaimer:
We are not doctors, nor psychologists, psychiatrists, or psychotherapists. In this podcast episode and blog post, we discuss the holiday blues from a purely personal standpoint and none of this is any kind of substitute for professional mental health advice, diagnosis, or treatment. If you are struggling, please know you can call 988 or go to 988lifeline.org. It’s a free and confidential network of local crisis centers especially for people in the United States who find themselves in emotional or mental crisis.
With that said, here are a list of points our discussion touches on:
What we call ‘the holiday blues’ can happen before, during and after the ‘official’ holidays.
A person’s depression isn’t necessarily obvious in their outward physical demeanor, especially if that person has become known in their social circles as being the ‘strong, responsible, or high functioning’ one.
Feeling a little downcast or low on energy is not an automatic sign of anything being wrong with you.
Feeling downcast or low on energy at times is normal, and a part of the natural way that life happens, much like the seasons turn in their own way, naturally, with Summer, Fall, Winter, and Spring. Nothing natural (so, like…nothing) is really meant to be in a ‘peak state’ all the time.
There’s so much more to say about the above. But here’s just some of it. Our culture is prejudiced against the acceptance of limits, either for ourselves as individuals or as a species. While there’s a place for the kind of upstart spirit that it sometimes takes to overcome obstacles, there’s an equal place for a more humble kind of restraint and abiding by limits in the interest of maintaining healthy relationships, well-balanced social and economic systems, and natural ecologies. Unfortunately, for hundreds of years now, the idea of allowing one’s self to in fact be limited is anathema to mainstream ideas of success and achievement. This prejudice against living within and accepting limits primes us for judgement against ourselves and others, if we don’t at least purport to aim at pushing past perceived limits. All this to say: maybe you could take a much wider view and critique the culture that primes you to make such judgements. After all, the automatic adulation given to 'breaking limits' is what’s brought us the planet-scale catastrophe of climate change, among other ills such as oligarchy, hoarding, and indefensible extremes of wealth inequality.
And finally, here are some quicker and shorter thoughts about ways to engage with 'the holiday blues.'
Siena has found that taking the first week of January off, if possible, allows her to recalibrate more smoothly when returning to work.
Light therapy lamps and light boxes made expressly for treating Seasonal Affective Disorder can help lift the mood produced by the organism that is you.
Infrared light therapy using a sauna blanket can also help.
Focus on things outside of yourself like helping others.
Get out in nature.
Have alone time…
But don’t isolate yourself
Toast suggests putting on holiday music that emphatically does NOT create a merry, happy, gay, bright, or otherwise jolly mood. Some song suggestions…
We Three Kings
Gabriel’s Message
River
The Wexford Carol
In The Bleak Midwinter
there are more, but looking for them is part of the not-necessarily-happy-kind-of fun, so we’ll stop there.